In my post on 21st June I had written about public behaviour of adults. Adults chiding children to behave well is a common sight. But more common than that is –adults’ misbehaviour.
As the Principal of a School, I have the pleasure and pain of meeting the adults of my students in different situations. I have already written about parents and PTMs. But parents and school functions- is another saga to share with one and all.
I meet adults who want their wards to participate in all the functions with enthusiasm. There are some-who want their child to be the solo performer. Yet there are some who bargain with their children- get an A grade and participate. There is a lot of bullying, pleading, emotional blackmail and pressure tactics that go behind the scenes before a child arrives on the stage.
In all this what parents miss out is the emotional dynamics of children.
Guess-growing up into adults blinds us to many emotional needs of the young.
Of course the adults of some of my students try to make us believe that they are doing a favour to the school by allowing their children to participate in the school programs.
Since we are educators and to a large extent-adults-we grin and bear with it.
The first phase is over with the child enlisting into the program. The next begins with rehearsals. Despite intimation and newsletters-the parents have million questions- guess as adults they are too busy to read or remember our communications.
Many adults make us feel good with their offers of help in carving out the programs and there are many more who are not very considerate towards the gigantic task that we undertake each year with more than 500 children participating in any event. Probably they do not have time to recognize the unique features of their child’s school. Appreciation does come -but from few ‘adults’.
Although we are not event managers-we the adults in the school manage everything- including the seating arrangement with seat numbers. Ironically the adults who go to watch a movie on time and sit in the seat allotted to them –do not do the same with us. Time is rarely followed and seat numbers with subtle pressure. Guess we have to learn the tricks from theatre managers.
Another interesting feature in many adults is-they have plenty of time to attend neighbors’ wedding, nephew’s thread ceremony or a cradle ceremony-they may take leave also to attend these functions. But for their child’s school function-the priority is last from the bottom. To please their child they may come- but they sit on tenterhooks till their child’s role is done –only to pick up the child and run away to another function or watch a TV soap at home.
The same adults who teach their children to be friendly with everybody do not wait for their child’s friends to perform.
When children are young we teach them magic words like -thankyou please and sorry . But as adults we tend to forget the magic in life.
40 to 50 educators who are not very clueful about dance or acting, stage management or costume designing –put up a wonderful show with 100s of children and appreciations galore pour in from guests –but parents ??? Only a handful of them make wonderful thankyou cards or send emails as a notes of appreciation. The majority of the adults-simply don’t believe in the magic word-thankyou.
The bottomline is-the adults in the school do not get deterred or discouraged as we do it with sheer pleasure of discovering our students in different moods. We adults are enjoying the golden childhood of our students-I hope their adults too- will do the same sincerely.